Mommy Meltdowns and Moments

Dearest co-laborers for the next generation, (a.k.a. Mom's)

Do you ever feel physically beaten up? Today was one of those days for me. We have hit a stride with our 7-month old, which is A.W.E.S.O.M.E. He is an amazingly easy baby. Which is good because his older brothers may well kill me. All before breakfast I had handed out two bouts with time-out, one spanking and multiple "this behavior is unacceptable" discussions. I so did not expect to be navigating the world of "he hit me" and "I had it first" so soon. You wiser, well-versed Moms are laughing aren't you? This is the stuff of toddler years, isn't it?

My Dad is a Pastor, and like myself, he is a true introvert. He would often come home after a day of ministry and report that he was out of "people dollars." Ya'll can I confess that these days this Mommy is nearly bankrupt of toddler dollars well before noon? Before NOON?! I don't bother to pray for patience anymore. I'm not sure there is enough. I do, however, pray for stamina. They are wearing me down!

I have found that on days like these commiseration is sometimes the best encouragement. I need girlfriends. I need someone to say "I know what you are going through." And while my husband is a remarkable man, he doesn't get it. How could he? This is a unique job the scope of which can't really be appreciated over a 4-hour stint while I'm out with my girlfriends. Recently I was trying to explain how stinkin' hard this is. I said that while I wouldn't trade staying at home what I did from 8-5 at Chick-fil-A (where I worked full-time before staying home) was WAY easier than what I do now.

(Now, for all you working Mom's I know you have the double portion. You do all I do and work. I know getting up at o'dark thirty and hauling kids to a sitter/daycare, sitting in traffic, and getting to work without getting cheerios or spit up on your outfit takes a literal act of God. I did it for four months, and I don't envy you.)

What I did at Chick-fil-A was hard, but so much easier than this. I felt daily affirmed and rewarded. I was valued. I saw immediate pay-off for hard work, etc, etc, etc. My sweet husband looked at me intently and said, "then go back to work; our household budget would thank you." You see, he can't understand.

This is the hardest and best thing I've ever done. I wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world. But today I am tired of explaining why sharing makes Jesus happy. I am tired of cleaning up spit up. For today I wish I could see that this is making a difference. For just today I want someone to say I have been there. How about you?

For the rest of this week I will be at the Proverbs 31 She Speaks Conference. I'll be investing my dollars in other women who feel called to speak, write, lead and serve all for the glory of God in the name of the Gospel. In my absence, enjoy some Mommy meltdowns and moments from some of my dearest girlfriends at Proverbs 31. They'll be sharing Mommy moments from the trenches. Many of them are well on the other side so they know what they are talking about. Be encouraged-oh, and laugh at their expense, they won't mind.

Hugs until next week.

You Tube Virgin

Thanks so much for all the kind comments and commiseration. The encouragement from Mom's in the trenches and Mom's on the other side has been invaluable. The only thing consistent in our collective experiences is the sweetness of surrender and sisterhood. We are in this thing called Motherhood together. We are not alone.

If you don't receive the Proverbs 31 Woman Magazine visit http://www.proverbs31.org/p31womanmagazine/thisMonthsFeature.php.

I wrote a feature about that very thing. Failure. Fellowship. Friendship. (By the way, I have no idea why that picture of the magazine is enormous. Sorry for the extreme close up.)

If you are here, and you're in the midst of something that seems exhausting and overwhelming listen to this. Know that right now, the best thing we can do is seize the day. Enjoy. (I sure hope this works.)

Wonder Mom

If you're stopping by from the Proverbs 31 Devotion, thanks for clicking on over. I'd love to get to know you a little better. Hi, I'm Whitney, but to my boys I'm Wonder Mom! We're friends so I can tell you that most days I'm just fudging my way through this motherhood thing. I make more mistakes than I can count. But just this morning I was simultaneously folding clothes and having a sword fight with my two-year old. Nothing spectacular. My form could certainly use some work, and in the end I did take the fatal blow. But I went out in style-lots of chocking and gasping for air as I fell to my death. As I laid on the carpet breathing my last my sweet, tasmanian devil little boy fell on my chest and yelled, "Yeah Mommy!" Then he kissed my lips and said, "Wake up sweeping booty." (For the uninitiated, let me translate. That's two-year old speak for "Sleeping Beauty.")

Isn't motherhood a kick in the head, or a stab in the heart?! What can simlutaneously exhaust and invigorate? Or more to the point, how can I love the company of my children yet countdown to naptime everyday? How can I feel like a supreme failure and still be heralded a super hero? Motherhood, it's a wonder we survive!

Are you a Mom? Do you know where I'm coming from?

Over the next few weeks I'm going to be doing a series of posts about Mommy Meltdowns and Moments. Stop back by for some encouragement and a good laugh. See you in a few! I'm being attacked by a rogue band of dinosaurs!

Working Dad

We had a discussion the other night at small group about finding Kingdom value in our 8-5 jobs. We are reading John Piper's "Don't Waste Your Life." (I highly recommend it!) I made the argument that in respect to finding value and meaning in the "daily-ness" of life, women have it easier than men. I'm now a stay-at-home Mom who works a little on the side, but even when I still worked full-time, I was a "working Mom." The moment I birthed our first-born and returned to work that became my title-"working Mom."

Sure, I worked at the corporate office of Chick-fil-A. Sure, I helped make Operator selection decisions. Sure, I contributed to our recruiting efforts across the country. But ask me (and anyone else for that matter) I was not an employee, I was a working Mom. Few things I did from 8-5 compared to the significance, joy and satisfaction of being Coop's Mom. It is ever more true now that I have three little ones for whom I am accountable.

Rarely (if ever) does anyone describe my beloved as a "working Dad." He, like most men, is defined almost exclusively by his career. Think about it. When you meet someone new one of the very first questions you'll ask is "so what do you do?" In the case of my beloved, the CEO, a catch all title for what he does is quite difficult to pin down-businessman, engineer, technical specialist, manager. He does a lot of things, and all of them excellently. However, the thing I think he does best is be a Dad. He works tirelessly most days more than 10 hours, and then spends the rest of his time wrestling with the big boys, showing them how to play video games, changing a diaper, feeding a rowdy crowd dinner, saying bedtime prayers.

Not unlike most Moms I know, his job is never done. He is a full-time employee and a 24/7 Dad, but rarely is he acknowledged as such. I don't expect my little blog will change societal mores, but it must change me.

I need to affirm my husband as the remarkable businessman AND father that he is. He doesn't do either in a vacuum. In each role he adds incredible value not only to the world and our family, but to the Kingdom. He is a man of incredible integrity. He seeks the welfare of others and success of his company at all times. He is zealous for excellence in all he does. He is quick to offer advice or prayer as the occasion arises.

If he finds it difficult to see the benefit of what he is doing perhaps he needs a more vocal cheerleader. What about the working Dad's in your life?

I love you darling. Thanks for being more than a man. You are my heart's desire. Our boys are immeasurably blessed.

Time Warp...

Hello long lost friends. To those faithful few who keep checking back in to see if I've posted anything new, you are too kind. Sorry I've been MIA. Did you know that life with a three-year-old, two-year-old and a six-month old is kind of hectic? I fall in the bed most nights (when I usually have good intentions of bloggging) in a near stupor. Lots of rest for the weary.

So I have much to update you on. We celebrated a momentus occasion in May. My sweet husband, the CEO, completed his MBA program and with a 3.98 to boot!! On top of that he was selected as speaker for his class a delivered an awesome commencement speech that thrilled my heart. We couldn't be prouder or more relieved. He loathed it, but learned a ton. Three years thankfully passed quickly and there will be no more nights where Daddy leaves us to go to school. I am no longer a single parent. Praise Jesus.

So how do you appropriately honor such a significant achievement? Italy? Greece? New York? Oh no friends, with three little kiddos, you go to Disney World. Eight days of fun, family and funds!! It was awesome. It was the first vacation hubs has had in three years that didn't require him to study late into the night after we'd all gone to bed. What a treat!

So we're figuring out life at the Capps household. It's a new normal, and I am loving it. I hope to be here more frequently these days. I'm emerging from the newborn fog...I can see the light. I have lots of updates on other things too, but in the meantime let me just say, I'm back!!!

I've missed you!